recently, any time I stand up the top of my feet start to tingle and hurt. usually when I lay down my hands and feet instantly go numb. yesterday my right hand in my last 3 fingers were numb/tingly all day. my pain meds are not working as well (I am not taking everything now due to the pregnancy) so I am spending more and more time in bed. that means more and more time away from the kids. that KILLS me. I always feel guilty about it. so on top of my stressing about new symptoms I also have the stress from extreme guilt about not being able to do more for my family.
It's been a couple months since my last scan so I know I will be due for one soon, but the thought of going into an MRI machine is horrible. (I am claustrophobic and can't take any meds for the scan right now) Plus it's easier for me to not know if the tumor is growing but then I freak out when I get new symptoms (like above). it also sucks not being around the kids and they are too young to understand.
I wish that the tumor was never found some days. I just want a normal life.
this isn't much of an update as you can see but I have just been feeling more and more upset every day by this and needed to get it out.
thanks for reading
xoxo
Kayla
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